the Me Ra Koh Blog

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Finding Healing

Moms are Brave and Afraid

Me Ra Koh

Self Portrait with Pascaline

I feel like my heart is resurfacing.

And even though I have been brave, I want to cry.

The last few years have felt like a blur.  I think the moment you start talking with your husband about moving across country is the moment you start grieving.  We started the conversation in 2013–almost three years ago.  It’s like your heart begins to retreat because you’re not sure how such a huge transition will feel.  You come to grips with the truth that moms are brave and afraid.  And a bit of survival mode starts to kick in even though you don’t know where or when you’re moving.  You can just smell it in the air like the Fall burning piles.

If 2013 was about starting the conversation, the next year was all about taking action.  In 2014, we packed up our sweet home of ten years, put everything in storage, put the home on the market and left with one way tickets to film our family travel show.  Even though the home was empty with a For Sale sign in the front yard, it still felt like our home because it hadn’t sold yet.  I think that idea brought me comfort as we pushed into the unknown with our family.  When I’d feel overwhelmed, I would tell myself ‘We can always go home.  If this dreams gets to scary, to out-of-control, we can always go home.’  Those five in a half months of circumnavigating the globe deserve a book of its own.  I grew faith and courage muscles I didn’t know I had.

I remember one particular night like it was yesterday.  We had been in New Zealand and made it to Thailand.  We were stuck in Thailand’s jungle, checking our bank account, and realizing we didn’t have enough money to take us anywhere.  We were pretty much stuck in a jungle.  I looked at the kids and said “Well, we can look at this one of two ways.  One, we are stuck in a jungle because even if we wanted to fly home we don’t have the money.  Or two, God hasn’t revealed the next step yet.”  A week later we were invited to film in Israel.  God had revealed the next step.

sunflowers in Israel, Me Ra Koh

Sunflowers Bow Their Heads at Sunset Outside of Nazareth, Israel

We came home with $15 to our name.  That’s it.  Fifteen dollars.  It was August 2014.  We had put everything into our dream of filming a family travel show, and we still didn’t have confirmation from the networks.  Our home hadn’t sold, and Brian and I found ourselves sitting in an empty house wondering what had just happened.  To say our life felt bizarre is an understatement.

Within the next few months all hell broke loose while doors also opened.  Ever have that happen?  Doors are opening, revealing your next steps, but everything is turning upside down.  By October 2014, only three months later, we emptied our storage unit, loaded two Uhauls, and moved our family from Seattle to Dallas.  That was the first time I ever moved away from home.  So funny because I will travel to the most remote area, but move my family…no thanks.  Washington had always been my home base.  The holidays, the laughter, the cousins, my parents…I was good to travel anywhere as long as I got to come home to them.

Me Ra Koh family

That was nine months ago.  We’ve been in Dallas for nine months, and tonight I sat in the shower and cried.

Our home in Washington sold this last week.  That back-up plan was giving me more comfort than I realized.  And it’s finally gone.  Tears just keep coming.

And yet, tonight I felt my heart landing.  Not the kind of tease landing that a helicopter will do, only tapping the ground’s surface to pull up instead.  That’s the kind of landing I’ve been feeling since we moved here.  I touch down but keep my main rotor blade whipping in circles above so I can retreat at moment’s notice.  I think something inside of me felt the motor stop tonight.  And the rotor blades finally slowing down. Those blades started whirling the moment Brian and I first talked about possibly moving in 2013–leaving all that we knew behind, all our family and friends, all our history…they are finally coming to a stop tonight.

I think I’m just now seeing how challenging the last three years have been.  Hahahahahaha!  (I laugh out loud in an empty home while sitting at my desk.  My cat looks at me like I’m crazy.  My dog sighs.)  I’m just now seeing how challenging things have been?  No. Not really.  But there is a deepened awareness as I feel my heart resurface.  And I realize I have so many things to share.  So many vignettes to blog about.

After seven years of writing blog posts almost every day of the week, I came to a grinding halt last year.  Why did I hit the pause button on blogging?

1.  Overwhelmed with Life.

2.  Facebook changed the blogging world dramatically.  I felt like my voice was losing the battle as it competed against all the online noise.  I remember the early days when I would post a blog in the morning, and thousands of moms (many of you) would grab your morning coffee and meet me.  Facebook changed all of that, and I think I just wanted to pout versus find a way to adapt.  I’ve finally adapted and show up on my Facebook page everyday, enjoying new conversations with new and old friends.

3.  I also felt overwhelmed with the “right” way to write a blog post.  Lists posts were in demand, not long posts of prose like this.  I began challenging myself with how to post in list form, 12 Tips for Taking Amazing Family Holiday Photos, 8 Ways for Mom to Look Great in Photos, 5 Tips to Photographing Multiple Siblings, 9 Travel Tips for Working Moms, etc. etc. The truth is that I actually click on these types of list posts ALL the time.  I love reading them too.  But that was all I felt the freedom to write. Before I knew it, I lost my sense of balance, voice, and purpose for showing up on my blog.  I was more focused on every post counting, being as viral as possible, versus finding the balance and simply meeting you here.

4. The hundred NDAs we had to sign with the networks.  That alone scared me into silence.  Kind of.  🙂

As women, especially moms, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to get things right the first time.  We feel the fleeting energy of our kids lives, and we don’t want to risk losing a single moment on an idea, project or creative endeavor that may not pan out.  That’s time we can’t get back with the kids.

And along the way, we’re always staying on the pulse of the latest scientific research and interviewing cutting-edge scientists to get all of the latest and greatest energy enhancement strategies in existence. Our commitment is to be the world-leading source of science-based content on overcoming fatigue and enhancing energy levels. Increase your energy and get some tips from theenergyblueprint.com/.

As a working artist, we also struggle to keep our ear to the ground on the changing trends while at same time stepping into the dark to create.  Sometimes we get stuck in one space, and other times we must choose one or the other for a season.

Creating a family travel show has been the biggest, creative undertaking I have ever attempted.  It asked everything of me and my family; our home, our comfort, my fears, my security, and more.  Throughout this journey, I’ve discovered that we each wake up with a bucket of creativity.  And once we pour that bucket out, it’s almost impossible to create anymore until the next day.  When I was writing my first book and pregnant with Pascaline, I felt like I couldn’t even put words together.  My writing mentor at the time told me that all my creative energy was going into making a baby.  She encouraged me to wait and see how my creativity would re-ignite when the pregnancy was over.  She was right.  Creating a family travel show has felt similar to being pregnant and birthing a baby.  And with our Pilot being reviewed by the networks, I feel like my creativity has graduated to a new level–and no show will ever be as scary, overwhelming, or risky as that first baby.

Now that I feel myself land, I can turn around and see the amazing view of how far we’ve come.  And I hear my heart say ‘Wow, we came all that way.  Let’s tell them about the things we learned along the way.’

Tuscany at sunset, Me Ra Koh

Tuscany Hills at Sunset, Italy

So let’s begin a new chapter on this blog.  This is a chapter that doesn’t look like the previous ones but is unchartered territory.  My muscle memory says “start blogging everyday again”.  But times have changed.  Our plate is full with creative projects, and we eagerly wait to hear back from the networks.  Yet, I’d like to meet you all here once or twice a week.  I’d like to share bits of the gold I found while mining in the dark.  There is much to say that will breathe life into your heart.

I see myself today.  I’m 42 yrs old with a tween and teen.  I’ve been a working artist for over twenty years.  My husband and I have risked everything not once, twice but several times to build dreams.  We now have a Production company with five books under my belt and a Disney Jr TV show.  I’m not the young mom photographer who first started this blog as she captured her daughter dancing in the doorway.

dancing girl in backlight, Me Ra Koh

But I’m still a mom who is both brave and afraid.  I’m still an artist.  My paintbrush is written words, captured imagery and speaking.  And most of all, I’m still dream linking.

If you’re out there, I’ll meet you here same time, same place.

xoxo,

m

Meet us for the CONFIDENCE Photography Workshop for Women.

  1. Molly

    July 29th, 2015 at 10:04 pm

    So many parts of this resonate with me. Sometimes I have a post I want to write but I think, “Oh, that’s not pinnable” and let go of the words I should have written down and the stories I’ve always been so passionate about telling. You inspire me once again. I love this new direction. And I’m planning to join you–both here and in my own space. xo, my friend.

  2. Me Ra Koh

    July 29th, 2015 at 10:19 pm

    I hear you Molly! From the deepest place inside me, I hear you. We’ve learned so many things on how to maximize social media that it’s almost overwhelming to sit down and just write something because you’ve got something on your heart to share. I love that you are out here with me. I know you get what it feels like to just write, release those bits of inspiration that are coming, regardless of whether they go viral or not. We’ve learned so much about being a mom over the years, being a working mom, creative, homeschooler and more…that if our words and shared experiences give life, energy, comfort, and laughter to one other young mama…we know it’s been worth it! Cheers to a new direction! And the best part is we’re taking all our social media wisdom with us!

    xoxox
    m

  3. Aina Cheek

    July 29th, 2015 at 10:58 pm

    Love this post as you continue to inspire us to reach for our dreams and encourage us never quit. So glad you and your beautiful family followed your dreams to Texas! Our state is better with you in it. Writing is a gift, capturing life through pictures is a gift. Thank you for teaching and imparting your gifts into the lives of many.

  4. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 11:58 am

    Thank you so much Aina! Your friendship has been one of those unexpected, wonderful gifts in moving to Texas! So thankful for you and your whole beautiful, creative, awesome family!!! Love you girl!
    xoxo
    m

  5. Jen Sulak

    July 30th, 2015 at 1:42 am

    I’m not even a mom yet..and i think about life while making, having and raising children…i wonder about my future as an artist…where God wants me…am I TRULY in the place he called me to be…I wonder how all the pieces of the puzzle fit within the heart of hearts and my family now and my family in the future. It has been quite the journey…i’ve learned so much….and learn so much by watching what God has called your family to. You guys help us dream a little bigger…and DO a little more for those dreams…my biggest pet peeve of parents has always been “i can’t because my kids”….but when the kids are there with you…you are a unit…you move as one….i think that is the neatest thing. I moved all the time as a child…and i’m ok with that…i had a friend or two i wrote letters to…but mostly I had to learn to adapt all the time to my surroundings. I’ve been planted here in dallas for 15 years now. Kinda funny when you have those moments of being still…and then God wakes you back up again…to live for him, serve him and use your creative gifts. I’m so glad i got that wake up call. There are a million things i may try to regret…but i make the most of every opportunity…be ok with the things i miss out on…and embrace the things i DO get to experience…anyways…i’m rambling at 142am…just because. <3 have a great week!

  6. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:02 pm

    Girl, I love that you took the time to do your beautiful ramblings here. You are a gem. You see the world with such a unique perspective, and you are building such creative, brave projects. But I know that with your unique perspective comes the sense of wondering if you’re in left field, wondering if you’re always going to feel off beat to society around you…I hope you never let that wondering stop you from being you. Purple dress, pink hair and Statue of Liberty hat and all! MWAH!

    xoxo
    m

  7. Kara

    July 30th, 2015 at 1:45 am

    Oh Momma,
    I’m so touched and encouraged by you and your bravery, but most of all, by you just being you and transparent. Transparency and honesty are hard to come by these days, and us moms need that from each other SO badly. I’ve followed your beautiful photography for years, dreamed of attending your workshops when I was timidly starting my own little photography business years (ok, 3 kids) ago. I even got to attend a PUG meeting that you hosted in your beautiful home years ago…I met you briefly and you are SUCH a beautiful person, inside and out. Anyway, all that to say I’m here…I love your heartfelt blog posts and truly connect with them. No lists needed, although I too read those from time to time as well. Keep doing what fuels your heart and creativity and God-given talents and gifts. You are touching SO many lives… more than I’m sure you’ll ever know.
    Much love,
    Kara – a fellow momma cheering you on! ?

  8. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Thank you so much Kara for your loving, encouraging words. Wow, I can’t believe you came to one of our PUG meetings back in the day. Those gatherings were so fun. Brian and I were so hungry for community with fellow photographers that we figured we’d better open our doors and do what we could to make it happen. Our kids STILL talk about those desserts–remembering the dining table covered with twenty different desserts! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! They have since compared every gathering to those PUG meetings, and we haven’t had one that lives up to those dessert spreads people would bring. 🙂

    But thank you for the permission, even though that can sound funny, to not write all list posts. I know you totally get what I’m saying. That sentence alone meant so much to me.

    Much love,
    Me Ra

  9. Lynda

    July 30th, 2015 at 1:57 am

    Can’t even tell you how happy I am to be reading this. I’ve missed your blogging – I know you’ve been reaching, believing & pursuing other dreams, BUT you have a voice that resonates with so many. I’ve missed that voice and was so happy to have found you here tonight. ?? Believing with you for all that is in your heart. Xo

  10. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:14 pm

    Thank you so much Lynda! Your words are such beautiful confirmation to my soul. It was so hard to step away from the blog for fear of losing all the momentum I worked so hard to build over the years. But you know when you hit that spot, and you see the step before you. And the step just doesn’t include certain things. I think that’s part of the faith walk. Setting things down and trusting that if you don’t pick the up again, you can trust the journey of it all. But I must tell you that I woke up with a smile in my heart today, seeing the next step being a return to the blog. My heart is smiling wide. And it’s sooooo wonderful to meet you here again.
    xoxo
    m

  11. Beth Daane

    July 30th, 2015 at 4:38 am

    Thank you. Thank you for listening to that “nudge” and writing that unplanned post and stepping forth into the light of the unknown. For taking the first step in blogging again and sharing your heart, your passion, your vulnerabilities… I too can relate with your sentiments (save the NDAs from networks!) ;). and it can be an awfully lonely place to be.

    My family took a leap like yours (in some ways) in 2011 and travelled cross-country wirhout knowing where we would land. We have landed and are still walking through the fresh unknown of what we did and why. It’s a wonderful and scary place to be.

    I stopped blogging during that time for many of the reasons you did. I am now just beginning to get back to blogging. Your words give light and encouragement and I thank you for them. Thank you. Thank you. Many blessings and goodness to you and your family, sweet Me Ra.

  12. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:22 pm

    Dearest Beth,

    I took a look at your blog, read parts of your rich story, and girl…you’ve got a lot going on. You have a beautiful way with words. And I love how you are embracing the unknown with your family. You are a brave mom, despite how afraid you may feel at times. And that bravery that pushes through the fog (the fog you know so well) is what our kids remember, what makes the difference, what gives them the courage to step into the unknown.

    Anytime you write a blog post, ping me on Facebook, and I’ll push it to our readers. Love your courage, honesty and creative spirit girl.

    xoxo
    m

  13. Melanie

    July 30th, 2015 at 7:53 am

    YES!!! I’m still out here! Gosh I love your writing style and voice. I’d rather that you took a year off than change any of it. Your words – both written and spoken – have been such an encouragement to me in my Brave Mom journey. I’m thrilled that it’s back on the blogosphere (do they still call it that?). I’ll be here eager to read each post. YAY ??

  14. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:33 pm

    Wow Melanie! Thank you so much! Girl, you are such a brave mama yourself!!! You have every right to be bullied by fear and doubt, but you push through with such strength and grace. Just look at your smile in your photo. You just beam with joy and strength. You know that, right?! I took some time and read your post about why you write your blog “Special”. What an amazing story. What a powerful journey. And that you share it with all of us. It’s such a honor to meet you here Melanie! Thanks for letting me know you are out there!
    xoxox
    m

  15. Melanie

    July 30th, 2015 at 1:23 pm

    I’m Mary Alessi & Mory Martinez friend…at the recent Flourish I told you how two years before your message prophesied everything that happened to me over the following year. The blog and speaking/writing thing started during that time. While I was here in the “desert”. It’s me, the “aloe plant” , oozing the goodness God has poured into me 🙂 thanks for looking at it, and seeing His joy even in my photo!!!

  16. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 1:34 pm

    THE ALOE WOMAN!!!! LOL!!!! I’m so glad you said that because I TOTALLY remember you!!! And I LOVED reading your heart’s story this morning too. What a gift you are lady!!!

  17. Kirstin

    July 30th, 2015 at 9:18 am

    Such a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing your heart. I’m sad I never knew of your blog while you were in seattle…I am from North Bend originally but now live with my hubby and girls 30 miles north of Portland, Or. It would have been fun to come to a workshop.

  18. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:35 pm

    Hi Kirstin!
    Thanks so much for your sweet words! I’ve got a wonderful teacher named Neyssa Lee in Snoqualmie area. You should look her up. She’s been one of my photography workshops teachers for a few years now, and she is a GEM! If nothing else, you would love meeting her! Her website is http://www.neyssalee.com.
    xoxo
    m

  19. Erin - Floret Flower Farm

    July 30th, 2015 at 9:19 am

    Me Ra, I’ve missed this part of you so, so much. Thank you for taking the time to sit and write this.

    I remember years ago when I saw a photo of you in a local wedding magazine and immediately went home to look at your site. Discovering your blog was life changing. Your honest sharing and beautiful images of day to day life with your family were a lifeboat for me at the time. I clung to every word and because you shared your journey, I felt that it gave me a map to follow on my own path.

    I understand how success and growth change things. How big leaps can leave you empty and needing space. The “why” starts to shift too as the voices of others get louder. In my own world I can see that I’ve drifted away from my original “why” because things are not as straight forward as they used to be and I have more people to please. But this post reminded me of how important sharing the process of being a creative business woman, wife, mother, creator…. truly is. I have some changes to make indeed. It’s time to get back to the heart of it all.

    As always, you are such a huge source of inspiration. Thank you for this post and I can’t wait to meet you here once again on a regular basis.

    xo ~Erin

  20. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:45 pm

    Thank you soooooo much Erin. Yes, you totally get it. I think that’s one of the biggest challenges in building a dream. Balancing the demands when you’re getting traction without losing the heart behind why you started in the first place. It’s going to be messy. Creative works always are. I try to remind myself of the freedom I had to fingerpaint as a kid. Not worried about the mess but just wanting to create. I love what you wrote; I have some changes to make indeed. It’s time to get back to the heart of it all.

    So powerful. That’s the beauty of this creative journey. We can find our way back at any time. We can even explore in other areas. And we can trust that if we listen to our creative spirit, it will always lead us home. So amazing how we can strengthen each other online. And it’s so needed when we are building dreams and raising young ones at the same time.

    Your home page image is absolutely STUNNING! It makes me miss my Dahlia garden that we left behind. I’ll plant a new garden here at some point, but that first image on your website took me back. Love what you do, what you’re about. Thank you for encouraging ME!

    xoxo
    m

  21. Beth

    July 30th, 2015 at 10:38 am

    Oh MeRa. I just love that you wrote this post. Here’s a HUGE hug!!! I have missed seeing YOU here on your blog. Thank you for sharing your heart. Xoxo

  22. Me Ra Koh

    July 30th, 2015 at 12:37 pm

    Girl, you are the sweetest! How many years have we known each other since you first came to one of our California CONFIDENCE Workshops. Or did we meet before that even?! I don’t even know. I just know that you are a such a gift to ME. You have a heart of gold, and I can’t even express how much you meeting me here over the years has meant. love, love, love you girl! xoxoxo, m

  23. Michele

    July 30th, 2015 at 3:13 pm

    Me Ra, it was when I first saw you on the Nate Burkus Show, talking about how you started out way back when…how you placed some photos in a few frames and invited people to add their names to a sign up sheet to have their own photo shoot done…well, your honestly and bravery just blew me away. I thought, wow, if she can do this, maybe I can do this too. That show replayed over and over again in my head…I knew I loved photography, and seeing you that day ignited a spark that grew to a flame and is now burning brightly in my life today. And so, when you open up so transparently to all of us, whether you know it or not, you are changing lives and showing us all how to be brave and follow our dreams, too. It doesn’t matter, Me Ra, if those networks ever pick up your amazing show. By merely stepping out into the world and grabbing hold of adventure wherever you are, you are showing us all how to live, REALLY LIVE, life fully! You are awesome, sister, and don’t you ever forget it! Blog or no blog, we’re all in this together with you! You are such an inspiration…keep the faith!

  24. Me Ra Koh

    July 31st, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    Thank you so much Michele! I think I’ll print your comments off and pull them out whenever I start to forget what is true. That is how awesome your note was! I love that you saw that specific Nate Berkus episode. Just so powerful, you never know who you are speaking to and the difference it can make. Will you share your website link with us? I want to see what your flame has grown into!!!

    xox
    m

  25. Michele Dwinell

    September 2nd, 2015 at 5:11 pm

    Hi, Me Ra! Sorry it’s taken so long to reply…got sidetracked with a brand new granddaughter!! Aren’t kids great? Anyway, I’m so happy that my comments meant so much to you. I truly meant every word. As for me, my daughter and I have joined forces to become a photo team, BECAUSE OF YOU! Our website is currently under construction…but believe me, as soon as it is live I will send you the link for sure! We’re all about capturing magical light…sound familiar?? (smiles)

    Since seeing you on Nate’s show, I made the scary decision to go back to school and study photography. For the last three years I have worked classes around my schedule and have enjoyed every minute! Hard to return to school as an adult…but what an adventure for me! I have entered my local fair, the Los Angeles County Fair, several times, and have won awards for my images. I, too, love traveling and shooting landscapes wherever I go. What a blast I’m having! But the one thing missing still is having the opportunity to meet with you and learn from you personally. I hope, sincerely, that one day I’ll have the chance to give you a hug and tell you how much you have inspired me. You and I are kindred spirits, ever drawn to the light in an effort to tell a story. What a great blessing and gift to be able to do this. And Me Ra, as soon as our website is up, I will send you that link. Promise. And you keep on being the powerful woman and example that you were born to be. Love you much!

    xox
    m2

  26. Ellie

    July 30th, 2015 at 4:18 pm

    I love this post and love your words. I can’t wait for more. Thank you!

  27. Me Ra Koh

    July 31st, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    Thanks Ellie! hugs and kisses and much more to come!
    xoxoxoxox

  28. stacy

    July 31st, 2015 at 12:34 am

    I’m so glad you took the time to write what was in your heart today and while your family’s journey is certainly a unique one it still resonates with so many of us. I know you know I have been climbing up mountains of my own and I think at the end of the day it is really important for us to be honest with one another and take a look behind the glass. Through the smiles there are sometimes tears and in the tears there can be the most beautiful smiles and in the end it all comes down to having courage and letting go. Your family certainly has been an inspiration to me! Keep climbing and looking back at how far you come and telling us all about it along the way. Love you lady!!!

  29. Me Ra Koh

    July 31st, 2015 at 6:23 pm

    Awwww Stacy. I love that we met a couple years ago, or was it only a year ago??, all I know is that you are a gem! You are inspiring other moms with your social media wisdom and talents, and I just love your spirit most of all. It shines through ALL the hard work you do. Thank you for being such a dear woman, fellow mama, through and through. Thank you for taking time to share what you did. Means the world coming from you Stacy.
    xoxo
    m

  30. Julie Watts

    August 1st, 2015 at 2:27 pm

    I’ve been in a new career, new work “home” new work “family” and new “clients.” I mentor mostly young women going to dental and medical assistant school. I interview them and match them with externship sites. Most of these students have never leaped BIG before in their life. They are pursuing their first DREAM. You are reminding me that I am in the position to introduce them to DREAM LINKING. I have a lot of free rein to design what their visit to my office is like, visually and otherwise. I have a feeling your yummy long posts are arriving at just the right time for me to develop and discover just how to influence these students as they take flight. I can’t wait!

  31. Me Ra Koh

    August 2nd, 2015 at 5:51 pm

    Oh my goodness Julie, what a gift they have in you being there mentor! Their time with you will definitely be a milestone in their dream linking! Love and miss you dear friend.

    xoxo
    m

  32. Robin Fuehrer

    August 1st, 2015 at 10:57 pm

    Oh MeRa, welcome back! My heart is too full from reading this post to say any more than, it’s so good to hear your voice again!

  33. Me Ra Koh

    August 2nd, 2015 at 5:52 pm

    Yay Robin, what a gift to see your name again! xoxoxoxo, m

  34. Tina Gartley

    August 2nd, 2015 at 8:46 pm

    This message has come at a time when my life is facing many changes. I first saw you on the Nate Burkus show. I remember watching and thinking, that’s me! Your story was so moving and your photography style was so similar to mine. My life is photography. It’s my passion. It’s what I think about everyday. I’m 56 and fresh out of an abusive relationship. I’m faced with selling the home I’ve known for 18 years. I’m stumbling through building a business. Thank you for sharing your story. It’s inspirational and helps us see we are not alone in our journeys.

  35. Jen Sulak

    August 3rd, 2015 at 12:32 am

    AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I just saw the comment you left. *sniff* Yea i have these very “powerful” seeming moments where i question everything….and I have to let it all come outward…sortof of confessions of the soul…the fears…the insecurities…and then I steer back from “wondering” to WANDERING with the ONE that has the path lit. I used to kinda joke about that you know…when it says light to our feet and path? It doens’t say how far the light goes out. So sometimes it feels really dark and unknown anyways! 🙂 I was having another moment tonite….and then I found that comment. *hugs*

    Basically I cannot wait for October…and I’m making sure my heart gets ready to receive all that will happen and all the possibilities. And…i just now mentioned it to my husband. I better ask for forgiveness for that one. LOL 🙂 anyways…have a super week…take it all in.

  36. Stephanie

    August 3rd, 2015 at 4:17 pm

    Beautiful post. Blogging has changed so much since the mid-2000s. I miss the community that existed back then…but I also have excitement about what lies ahead.

    Best wishes with all of your adventures. Being brave is worth the chaos.

  37. Karen Wilhelm Buckley

    August 6th, 2015 at 3:27 pm

    Me Ra,

    Once again, you touch my heart with the power of your vulnerability.
    An authentically powerful leader speaks from a well of beautiful inner wisdom – linked with skills, strategies, and just plain taking action to make things happen that wouldn’t have happened before. You are a such a wise leader and I appreciate you and the power of the way you are in the world – as well as your fantastic photographs, books, and….. what is soon to be a very popular family travel show! Can’t wait!!
    I’m grateful that you found your words again, and that you are doing it your way with lyrical rhythm rather than driving staccato, with tenderness rather than ego, and with complex conundrums rather than easy solutions.

    We like it!

    Be well,
    Karen

  38. Carrie Hasson

    August 7th, 2015 at 10:23 am

    Oh, how I’ve missed you! Life and time are so funny sometimes. I hear your voice again and it fills my heart. I have been in HUGE transition over the past 4 years…it’s shaken me to my core, built my faith in ways I could never imagine, and I am starting to realize for the first time in my life that I can… I CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I can trust Him to lead me and my decisions, and I can listen to my voice and believe in it. That doesn’t mean I’m not scared to death. I still am waiting for my Israel. I know that those next steps don’t happen without work though. It would be so helpful to me if you could share what you did in that time of waiting, that week that must have felt like years? That time of faith so strong you can barely breathe. Surviving but searching for the joy, knowing and trusting that God will provide the way. That’s where I am today. Every word you shared here resonated with me, thank you for sharing your heart again MeRa, thank you for being vulnerable…it really is where the GOLD lies….Big hugs and prayers to you and the family! <3